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Old 09-08-2012, 11:14 PM
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nycindie nycindie is offline
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: The Big Apple
Posts: 10,083

Originally Posted by codydarkstalker View Post
He had previously asked about seeing other people but I told him I'm not ready for that.
Originally Posted by codydarkstalker View Post
He hadn't been interested in dating me at first and was nervous about me having a bf already and not wanting him to see other women (I'm still working on jealousy and insecurity right now).
Well, I think that if you want to juggle two relationships and have them move along, work out well, and fit together nicely in your life, you should start making changes in the area of expecting both your boyfriends to be monogamous to you, while you can have more than one lover. (!)

You say you are "still working on" your jealousy and insecurity, but that sounds like just lip service. Exactly how do you "work on" these issues? What steps are you taking to resolve them? Do you have a plan to move past those uncomfortable feelings? It isn't very respectful if you use jealousy and insecurity as an excuse to treat them unfairly so you can feel (falsely) like you're "in control."

Be careful -- this can only go kablooey in your face if you don't start examining and moving boundaries now. They will not tolerate this unfairness for long, so you should start looking at being more generous in spirit and make the first move towards equanimity, before someone cheats to get what they really want, and which is forbidden to them by you.

Good luck!
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