Thank you very much for your reply. Yes the advice I am receiving so far seems to coincide with one another. If I may ask as I cannot quite tell from your reply, in your situaltion who's idea was it to become or try a poly relationship? A 20+ year friendship is definately impressive andt that their closeness has grown over the years enough to lead to a relationshiop between the three of you. You said your wife and her friend are not bi, if I may ask was it hard for your wife at first anyhow knowing her husband was being intimate with another woman, best friend of 20 years or not one is still sharing a part of themselves your being 27 years. I guess I mean that forst plunge, first step? the jealousey, it ia a natural human emotion. she may not have had any due to the existing strong relatioships she had with her friend. I have actually met someone who I am just in the getting to know you stage, he's from out of state I'm PA he is MD and about 7hrs between us, we are both willing to meet half way, meet the whole way, or anywhere in between. we have not been sexualy active yet. yes there is that attraction, but I want to take it slow, I am new here, I wan't to make sure, some poly individuals i see depending on their situation have several partners. At this begining of my journey and my husbands too right now at first we are just looking for someone we each can spend time with alone, enjoys anothers company, and enjoys anothers intimacy if it leads that way. The fellow I met kinda just fell into my lap, I was looking, but not actively looking , I had met him online. Heres the thing other than knowing someone, close friend,having deep personal feelings with we don't, I'm ok with approaching total strangers, lol, my husbans not so much. In your opinion do you see a trend where it's easier for women to attract a mate/s than men, just like when a monogmous individual would i guess date? I get spoken to all the time, the person I am getting to know he found me on MY Space and really took off from their as I said i was looking but never imagining finding a partner on my space of all places, I mean the man is real and not an asshole, I get so many pervs sending email on my space it's beginning to bother me, because I not that kind of girl. Anyhow that what I ws just saying about rather long winded (i'm sorry), but my husband is finding it difficult to find a partner, neither of us know anyone in our own network of friends to approach. Everyone so far has given me good ideas of where to meet people so far. He says it's easier for women to find a partner because their women. I really feel bad I of course love and am committed to my husband, but hearing the forlorn in his voice, I want him to experience the well at the moment exhiliration and newness of learning someone else and enjoy that person. Any ideas for him? are there any match making websites? Neitherof us want to have many partners. I see some people do. Oh well, thank you for listening, again. If you (or anyone else) have any more suggestions or advice for me please write back. And again thank you very much for your advice I really appreciate it.