Thanks Ny. I will check that out.
Ciel - Also, thank you very much for your advice. Discomfort with communication is the main problem I am facing. I feel like I am being obsessive and overly worried about all this. To a certain extent, you have to accept some risks and I understand that. I just want us to all get on the same page about what those acceptable risks might be. As it stands now, I haven't had sex with my bf who's other partner just started a sexual relationship with a new man. I feel like we need to have a family meeting about it, but two of us live relatively far away from the other two and I haven't even met the metamore's new bf yet. I'm holding off on sex with my boyfriend until we come to a clear and solid agreement.
Your input is greatly appreciated, and so was your lesson in appropriate terminology. I am a big fan of using the correct words to most succinctly describe nuances whenever possible