Originally Posted by LovingRadiance
I had issues with the phone, very similar to what you describe. I did ask that meal times, bed times and our date times are 'just for us'. So, no answering messages, no phones on. That has made a huge difference and I found that I am not triggered even half as often by the sounds and interruptions now that theres a guaranteed time they don't occur.
Bit late to this, and distracting from the baby-related chatter, but just wanted to add I SO
identify with this trigger. Constant phone beeps and pings and vibrations had me thinking that DH and his new girlfriend were constantly talking to each other ALL THE TIME and it drove me crazy for a few weeks. I'm just about getting a handle on it now I think, but it still pops up for me a fair amount. DH is pretty good about not answering when we're on dates, and at meals, but they always wish each other a goodnight by text, which when I'm less uncertain about it all I'm sure I'll find sweet.
We're in the process of trying to work out an agreement re: him messaging his new sweetie while we're on our two week honeymoon next month. Eep. We don't want it to become a source of argument or tension while we're gone, we're working out a system whereby when we're not actively involved in "doing" something, he may step away and catch up while I read a book or something. Don't want to put a timelimit on it or anything (nothing like a deadline to make something seem more important or desperate, eh?) so I shall trust my DH to just simply be polite and focus on us the rest of the time
One friend said I should make him sever all contact for the two weeks, but that just seems like cruel and unusual punishment to me! I'm sure we'll figure it out.
Anyway. I thought I'd offer another story to show you're not the only one in the throes of that! I hope the tips n tricks people have given you re: coping with the baby and involving your partner more are helping!