Originally Posted by BoringGuy
OP, learn to be your own best friend and i promise you, this problem will magically disappear.
That said, it is EXTREMELY hard to take this advice if you don't get there yourself. When my partner said it to me, it felt like I was being dismissively told to "go find something to do". It took a full day of not having him or the kids around to see that I really didn't know what to do with myself (it didn't help that I was not all that long out of my marriage and didn't have time to figure that out before getting into a relationship with my partner).
That sudden, stark realization was extremely painful, but it was a hell of a motivator... I am NOT nothing when I have nobody to be with. So who am I and what do I like to do?
But I had to hit that wall myself, unfortunately. Hopefully you don't have to quite go through the same process... Good luck!