Originally Posted by GalaGirl
And how will Dad get BETTER at baby soothing unless he practices and clocks the time? How will BABY learn Dad can also soothe baby unless he practices and clocks the time? The role of the father is to teach baby comfort can come from OTHER places too -- not just the food lady.
And how will either DO this learning, if Mama won't just surrender baby to Daddy and walk out of the room?
Not leave the house -- just leave the room. Give him baby all nicely topped up from nursing and check out to read a magazine, do internet fun, catch a movie.
If your are at the 30 min tops place? Go get your 30 min! Grow it to 35 min! One baby step at a time, eventually you grow it to longer and hallelujah! You get to the place where you can leave the house for a few hours.
You are the SAHM and clock way more baby hours daily - so YOUR baby skills grow at much faster speed and baby's trust in you grows that much faster. That is natural and normal.
But don't let Daddy off the hook just because he's clocking baby time at a slower time. He's a parent too -- and that means YOU have to suck it up a bit on watching/listening them figure each other out even if you have to leave the room. You do your baby and Daddy no good in stunting their rship development time, and you do your OWN health no good by not taking the break.
Did you have this baby together or not?
He can and does soothe the baby.. sometimes. Sometimes it has to be me.
All the rocking, walking, playing, patting, etc that Daddy can do sometimes just doesn't cut it. I won't let the baby scream himself into exhaustion just to get used to being around Daddy more, so I'd rather just let them be at it when he's happy, or at least not too upset, and take him when he starts to get to that place where no amount of Daddy-hugs and singing can console him.
Sometimes I ask him to take him while we're sitting on the couch together. That helps with being touched out, and the baby will stay happier longer. He just gets upset if he can't see me, and I understand that. He doesn't really have a concept of time yet. If Mommy is gone, who knows when or is she is coming back! Time to cry.
It was easier when our respective mothers were visiting. He sits much better with another woman. There is improvement, though. He used to fuss just being handed to Dad, so, progress.
No fair, you edited on me.
I'll have to remember to come back to this. Right now, little man needs a nap.