Originally Posted by opalescent
Tell him he is responsible for meeting his needs not you. You are not playing that game any more. No more indulging him. He's a grown man not a child. He is to take charge of finding and participating with other kinksters. It's time to man up.
If he refuses, then tell him divorce is your other option. Yes harsh. But not taking care of one's needs and expecting you to do all the work of making him happy is not indicative of a healthy grown up marriage.
This. It's his responsibility and nobody else's.
When speaking of various forms of non-monogamy...it ain't poly if you're just fucking around.
While polyamory, open relationships, and swinging are all distinctly different approaches to non-monogamy, they are not mutually exlusive. Folks can, and some do, engage in more than one of them at a time--and it's all good.