Thread: Gender roles
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Old 12-10-2009, 01:11 AM
AutumnalTone AutumnalTone is offline
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Originally Posted by Sweetheart View Post
What are the roles like in your relationships? Who works? All or both of you? Only one of you? Who stays home with the kids, if anyone? Who does the cooking or cleaning? Do you find yourselves imitating gender roles modeled when you were young, or have you broken away from what you were taught?
I really wasn't taught any gender roles at home--only had a mother in the home, so she had to do most everything. I'm the only student in the history of my junior high to have checked out The Joy of Cooking (for almost three months). I took crafts classes and power mechanics, both.

I was a stay-at-home dad for a short while after moving once, while searching for a job. My first wife wasn't skilled at much of anything, so I taught her how to cook and how to change the oil on the car and other stuff.

My second wife was always on the go and had run a farm prior to us getting together. She was happier working outside mowing and raking and stuff while I stayed inside cooking. I also taught her how to fix things on cars and she exposed me to home brewing and spinning and stuff.

Curly doesn't cook very well at all, so I do most of the cooking. As in the previous marriages, we both work. The double incomes are needed, for a practical reason. I won't pay to support anybody who's capable of doing productive work, for a more abstract reason; I have no very young children, nor will I have any more in the future, which could lead to me supporting somebody to stay at home and provide full-time care.
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While polyamory, open relationships, and swinging are all distinctly different approaches to non-monogamy, they are not mutually exlusive. Folks can, and some do, engage in more than one of them at a time--and it's all good.
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