some people who enjoy the closness of other people in their life that dont have much baggage realy enjoy poly and the excitment of sharing and doing things together.
some people enjoy the madness of all the baggage and problems with kids and create more problems to the point their lives are so chaotic and toxic to the point they become in time accepting and masochistic to this way of life.
A couple with kids will tell a female she is part of the couple to share each other, then she realizes she is really their house slave, others will crave to be their house slave.
Other people act like they are pure polly and feel they are above all others that call themselves polly and are very closed minded. like many lesbians that call them selves pure lesbian and above all other lesbians that have actually had sex with a man at some time in their past, and are more closed minded than strait closedminded bible beaters.
some females do not like being second in a poly relationship, and compete for the man, others who are submissive and bif are happy to submit to both.
I think its importand to know what roll you want in a relationship, getting with the wrong people can end up a nightmare,
I think people get out of poly what they want to get out of it, but there is no one set standard, each group is different.