What is sms? Texting? You said you and Chris text each other, on average, every 20 mins? That is 3 times an hour, 24 hrs a day? Since one must work and sleep, there must have been time when Anna observed you texting Chris for an hour or two at a time when you were in the same room, I would think. Smiling, giggling in response to Chris' texts... perhaps becoming sexually aroused.
And that went on for several months before she finally checked your phone and saw you were having an affair.
Now, over 2 1/2 years have gone by since you were caught cheating. You love Chris, you love Anna. Anna and Chris' husband have had soulless loveless affairs, now that the marriages are considered "open." They are unhappy. You say Chris' husband is just hanging in waiting for his wife to get over her lover and come back to him. But 3 years later, she's still with you.
Everyone just seems to be waiting for someone else to make a move. Will Anna leave you? Will Chris' husband leave her? Will Chris leave her husband and move in with you?
Someone better shit or get off the pot. Y'all are in a sad state of limbo.
Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear. It is there most pure, perfect and unlimited when its votaries live in confidence, equality and unreserve. -- Shelley
me: Mags, 59, living with:
miss pixi, 37