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Old 08-18-2012, 04:49 PM
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Magdlyn Magdlyn is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Metro West Massachusetts
Posts: 5,085

It's funny, when my (ex) husband and I opened our marriage to polyamory after 20 yrs of marriage, it came as no shock to him at all that I felt I was poly. My "roving eye" and tendency to get crushes was always there, all that time. I thought I was evil and flawed, and my feelings towards others hurt him a lot (he had/has low self esteem and was very jealous) so I tried to downplay it and hide it for so long... to protect his feelings.

Finally, when I realized I wasnt evil, just poly, and had some language to explain it, he ended up embracing poly and in fact, got a gf, whereas I felt I was too busy raising the kids to date. But at least we could acknowledge how I had these feelings for others, though I chose not to act on them for practical reasons, lack of time and energy.

He did continue to be jealous though, hypocritical silly man, and that was one of the factors in our breakup 4 years ago.

3 months after we separated, I found a wonderful partner who has always been poly, and she and I have been together 3 1/2 years. I continued to date many men as well, had some interesting relationships of varying duration, and in Jan of this year found Mr Right. We are all 3 in something in between a V and a triad, with me as the hinge.
Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear. It is there most pure, perfect and unlimited when its votaries live in confidence, equality and unreserve. -- Shelley

Mags, F, 60, poly-dating, loving and living with
miss pixi, F, 38
also seeing
Punk, 42, M (dating since Oct 2015)
and a few more casual relationships
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