The L Word
I don't mean lesbian, I mean love.
I've been dating a boy for a bit. Well. Ok, here's the history (will keep it brief).
I've had a crush on him for years. I thought he wasn't into me, so okay, but I still have loved him as a friend.
We kissed in March.
By April, we were starting to see each other occasionally, but for a strictly casual sexual affair. He has a primary relationship, and he loves her, and he didn't really identify as poly so much as "open." She knows me and approves, and is poly herself (he's one of her two primary partners).
In early July, he said he wanted to actually "date" me. He's secure enough in his primary relationship, that he's open to actually dating.
He has told me, though, of prior dating experiences, where he's been scared off by people who say "I love you" too soon. One month = way, way too soon in his book.
I've loved him since before we even started playing around, and add to that, I'm crushing on him so hard right now. I also know, that sometime between one month and one year, he will move out of state and in with his primary partner. We'll hopefully still see each other, but maybe not as often? Maybe it's too soon to worry over that?
I know I should chill, and ride the experience, and not try to make a big deal about my feelings. I'm in other relationships, too, and I'm not certain I can even understand *why* I feel so driven to talk to him about my feelings. And I know that this terrible crush is clouding my thoughts, and once it passes, it will be much easier to sort out exactly how I feel.
How do you hold back from jumping in with the L word too soon?