Originally Posted by Hannahfluke
I don't know that it's necessarily true that who you choose to have sex with defines your orientation. My boyfriend helps friends with a big gay party each year. He's very straight, he does not find men attractive at all. But, if someone offers him a drink and then a blow job on this night, he'll accept it. He just really likes blow jobs and doesn't really care who gives them to him. I've talked to him extensively about this. He doesn't want to kiss them or have a relationship with them, in fact, trying to kiss them grosses him out. He considers himself heterosexual even though he's had this experience several times. So I'm not sure that who you choose to do sexual acts with necessarily defines if you're heterosexual, bi, etc.
Yeah, that situation, for whatever reason, seems different to me. I don't know why, but it does.
Originally Posted by Becca
Sexual orientation is definitely fluid. I've been lesbian most of my life, but a couple years ago, I "experimented" with a man, developed a relationship with him, and a couple others, and now am solidly "bisexual."
(Well, I don't really subscribe to binary gender, as there a lot of people who are genderfluid or genderqueer who I'm attracted to.)
But to address some points in your original post-- anal sex is definitely not a gay thing. You, as a man, have a wonderful thing called a prostate gland, and you can get something out of anal stimulation that people without that gland cannot enjoy. You should experiment with it.
As for sexual orientation, what other gender markers turn you on? Beards, hairy chests, broad shoulders? Rough skin and funky smells? Rumbly voices?
As much as my primary orientation is women, the truth is that I'm very much attracted to big bear type men, with the big hairy muscle-bound bodies-- not so much what I'd expect from an erstwhile lesbian, but there you go.
Gender markers that turn me on... hmm... I don't generally like hair of any kind (except for head hair, obviously) on anyone but me (and really not even on me but I look silly if I shave everywhere). I don't like smells at all. I would prefer a scent-less person. Soft skin. Voices don't matter. Broad vs skinny doesn't matter so long as it's carried well. I have found some bigger ladies very pretty and likewise found some skinny girls very unattractive.
If I were to give you all an example of a guy I could actually see myself dating, it'd be Matt Bomer (he's an actor). I know that's a pipe dream, but if I ever found a guy that looked like him, I'm set.