Considering my previous role as secondary today... Stuff to do with my expectation of more consideration than it was considered my due. I was a secondary in every sense of the word. Disposable and not the same value as a wife and anyone who came before me. I was expected to not ask to be considered, just be entertaining until the novelty wears off or I become a pain in the ass.
Thankfully my new BF does not consider me this way and we are working towards a better understanding of "secondary." He's awesome and we are a good match in terms of ethics.