OTOH - MrS and Dude were best friends before I got involved with Dude. While I think this did contribute to the upheaval of our early relationship contretemps (i.e. the mistakes I made) ultimately I think that they fact that they are best friends is what has made their metamour relationship so strong.
Big Risk, Big Reward.
I think, though I do not know, that I would prefer the boys pursue women that I am already friends with or COULD be friends with (a limited pool of women - I don't like most people). At least I think that there would be a better chance that she would consider my feelings carefully as well - because she likes me as a person in my own right as her friend...interesting to contemplate...
Me: poly bi female, in an "open-but-not-looking" Vee-plus with -
MrS: hetero polyflexible male, live-in husband (21+ yrs)
Dude: hetero poly male, live-in boyfriend (3+ yrs) and MrS's best friend
Lotus: poly bi female, "it's complicated" relationships with Dude/JaneQ/MrS (1+ years)
TT: poly bi male, married to Lotus, FB with JaneQ
VV and MsJ: bi-women with male primaries, LTR LDR FWBs to JaneQ
My poly blogs here:
The Journey of JaneQSmythe
The Notebook of JaneQSmythe