I know you and I are very different.
But-we aren't dating-and that makes it all good.
The thing is-if that is something the Op needs-then she needs to express it-and if it IS oppressive to the bf, this may not be a good match.
I have friends who I talk to RARELY (months go by) but I consider them CLOSE friends.
But-I don't have any lovers who are "secondary" and if I was building a primary relationship (both of mine are to me) then I would expect to be free to be in contact daily.
Right this moment DH is working out of town and we text periodically throughout the day. It's not really about "reassurance" it's about remaining connected to one anothers lives despite distance. That I have multiple lovers doesnt in anyway diminish my desire (or theirs) to remain connected daily.
So-if it's something like this that the op needs to be happy and content in a relationship, then it's what she deserves.
JUST LIKE-you deserve to not be harassed daily by texts and phone calls if you don't want them.
(I DO like when you disagree with me-because I really appreciate the way that you write out your disagreements and because it helps to have multiple viewpoints expressed. Besides-I just like you!)