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Old 08-08-2012, 05:03 AM
GalaGirl GalaGirl is offline
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Join Date: Jun 2012
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That's a hard limit for me. No relatives. Too messy for me to deal in.

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1) For my husband, he claims he would just feel compersion (that's the right term right?) in seeing me be happy with his brother. How realistic is this notion? Not just considering seeing me with another man but with his brother no less? Isn't that alone a minefield? The last thing I want is to cause difficulties between the two of them.
The only way to guarantee this won't cause difficulties is to not go there at all. Because once gone there? You cannot take it back. DH may SAY he would just feel compersion, but he doesn't know that for a fact. Are you prepared to pay the highest price going there? That your marriage divorces over it and you lose BOTH brothers and that side of your family network? And how does it affect your children lives then?

Think it all the way across and what all the cost would be -- the highest price.

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2) What is it generally like for "the secondary"? I absolutely do NOT want anyone to feel neglected or "feel secondary" although my husband always comes first. The bond I have with him is very deep and I can't imagine having such a deep bond with anyone else.... at least not at this time.
http://www.morethantwo.com/polyforsecondaries.html would be a good place to start reading.

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3) Do you guys know of any stories about two brothers, one woman type of polyamorous relationships out there? Doesn't matter if they're success stories or not, we would just like to read about all possible outcomes and pitfalls.
Nope. Not personally. I only know a man who dated once sister first, and they broke up... then after a while he started dating the other sister. They all seem to get on ok, despite the fact he's been lover to both at one point or another. But they are not attempting a shared polyship thing. It was him dating one, then the other. With a big chunk of time in between the two so it was two distinct separate relationships. Their parents and extended relatives and stuff seem ok with it. Which surprises me, frankly -- most of the time people don't want to go even there. So I doubt most families would be all "Yay! A polyship of brothers! Whee!"

Even just on the safe sex thing -- lordy. SO would not want to deal in an "oops baby" in this scenario.


GG

Last edited by GalaGirl; 08-08-2012 at 05:06 AM.
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