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Old 08-07-2012, 10:16 PM
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nycindie nycindie is offline
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: The Big Apple
Posts: 10,083

Originally Posted by CrapEndOfTheStick View Post
She informed that she and her Dom wanted to start doing slaps and strikes to the face. I sad emphatically "NO.. No way in Hell!" . . . I don't like seeing bruises and red-angry marks on my wife's skin that I know were left by someone's intentional actions... I don't care if she wanted it, I still don't like.. Number 2 and it's big one. She works in a very conservative office, and the last thing I need is a bunch of office-harpies thinking I'm beating my wife up, because she keeps showing up every so often with a bruise on her face.
Originally Posted by newtoday View Post
I don't know much about BDSM but this is very disturbing to me . . . Who, in their right mind, would want to go to work every day with bruises/marks on their face?!?! Shit, I'm all for a little spanking, biting, little marks, where they can be HIDDEN, not on show for the world but visible markings, particularly on the face, neck area?
I just wanted to respond to these passages. I am not into BDSM, but I like to do some kinky things every now and then. I do occasionally like having my face slapped during sex, and have allowed two of my past lovers to do that. I have never had a bruise on my face from any of those instances. Yes, red marks in the moment, but never anything lasting. I'm not really into it for the pain or any humiliation; I just like the little bit of shock and surprise it gives me, and I really only like it when I am riding on top. So, perhaps I never was bruised because my lovers weren't actually trying to beat me, or because it's never anything I've done for a prolonged amount of time - since after a few slaps the shock value is gone. I can't imagine wanting to be slapped around as if someone was beating me in an attack, but I just wanted to say that I have experienced face slaps without having any marks on me afterward. So, maybe there is a middle ground where she could have a little of it as long as the technique used is very carefully and measuredly administered so as not to bruise.

Of course, I am not addressing all the other fucked-upness about her relationship with her Dom, which need to be addressed before anymore leeway is given her. I just wanted to address that one point. HTH.
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