Originally Posted by sacredlove
... my husband doesn't understand why I'm punishing him for living exactly the way I think we should, and has no idea how to make me feel secure enough in our relationship to honour his love for someone else.
How could he help you feel secure? Is it time? Space for you the two of you without K? Space for the two of them without you? Chocolate? It might be worth reading The 5 Love Languages
to work out how you can all best communicate your love for each other in a way the other understands. Once you've pinned it down, make sure you tell your husband the magic formula; don't make him guess.
Once you're feeling a little more appreciated, you'll probably want to work on your jealousy. As you know, you need to work out what's triggering it so you can root it out at the source, otherwise it just sits in the corner waiting to leap out when you least expect it. I'm a big fan of the broken refrigerator
analogy from Xeromag when it comes to that subject.