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Old 12-07-2009, 03:47 AM
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Legion Legion is offline
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Join Date: Oct 2009
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ceoli View Post
So let's lay it out there. What's the difference?
my opinion/perception of underlying principles:

Poly:
1. Love is self-perpetuating in all its forms (romantic, platonic, agape, &c.). The more you love, the more love you have.

2.



Mono:

1. Love is self-perpetuating in all forms excepting romantic love. In regards to romantic love, the more individuals you love, the less you love each one. True, pure and legitimate romantic love is reserved for one person, all others are forsaken and forsworn.

2.


Other rules or guidelines like honesty, communication, and trust are not specific to one or the other, but I think an important thing to recognize is that these are two very different paradigms: sets of assumptions, concepts, values, and practices that constitute a way of viewing reality for the communities that share them.

There are all sorts of beliefs that people hold, but these vary from individual to individual. Things like: "if a man cheats, it's because his lover wasn't any good." or "Bros before hos". They can be sexist, racist or in our situations, prejudices about lovestyles.

I admit I am one of those that sees monogamy as a less enlightened way of living when used as a moral compass. I respect our MonoVCHP's way of living and also my lover, Bee's declaration that she "doesn't really want to sleep with anyone else because things get confusing." That's fine if you don't have the desire or the time or whatever it is. I guess part of my high horse when it comes to poly vs. mono is that I get defensive. I've had people respond the same way jools described but I wasn't as savvy to answer so appropriately. I end up defending my way, and they defend theirs... sigh.
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