Oh dear ... that sounds so ugly. I am sorry to hear about this. Take care and stay strong through this
And don't start to believe in his words. I know that it is tempting to search for flaws and there is nothing wrong with looking into things why this or that went wrong, but don't take the blame alone. It's ridiculous to say that you are at fault for his thievishness.
Facts: 30, female, bi, v-type relationship with Sward (husband, straight, mono) and Lin (boyfriend, straight, mono), poly-fi and co-primary.