By "Unicorn shaped hole" I mean that you appear to have a shape already worked out for this potential GF to fit in to. From your other thread it appears the big ones are: She will date both you and your husband. She will be equally involved with both of you. She will not be allowed to fall in love with either of you or be allowed to cause either of you to fall in love with her. You haven't mentioned if she will be allowed to have existing children or other relationships outside of the one she'll have with you, so you may not have those criteria on your unicorn-spotting checklist.
By insisting on such specifics you will have great trouble finding someone who fits all your criteria. If, instead, you go out and meet someone and then just see how the relationship develops you might just find someone who checks boxes you didn't even know you had.
As for the "16 year old niece" thing, well sexting - the sending of nude or explicit photos, usually by phone - is quite common in that age group. Both you and the hypothetical 16 year old are venturing into new dating territory. I'm not trying to imply you're immature, but you do show signs of naively trusting where you might better hold off a while.
Last edited by Emm; 07-31-2012 at 03:43 AM.