Well, if he's looking for transcendant sex, in a hard swinger context? I dunno how well THAT'S supposed to fly.
I agree. Pin his booty down. None of this verbal avoidy sparring. STATE YOUR WANTS, NEEDS, LIMITS.
When he floats off all avoidy do the flip and restate.
"You are saying blahblah. Please be clear and direct with me. I am hearing that you looking for me to be ok with you having a hardswinger sideline going. Is this correct? And you plan to be doing this how? every Fri nite?"
Pin it the freakin' flip DOWN.
He has to offer you a new relationship contract then, articulate what he's after. Because he's not honoring the contract you are on now. He's breaking previous agreements.
If he's the one wanting to go poly? Give me your contract in writing, one page front side.
Want, needs, limits, goals/reason to do it for.
I will consider and bring my own contract out. We can take it to the mat and see what can be negotiated or not.
Crap contract? Check out. He's not for reals.
Decent effort, needs polish? You actually willing to go there? How does it jive with what YOU want in your current rship contract? Not a love match any more? Check out.
I keep saying the same thing to you from different angles to see if any of that can aid you.
But if he's squirming around and refuses to play ball in turn about fair play? That tells you all you need to know. He will ALWAYS do that. Check out and spare yourself the agony of living with a "have my cake and eat it too" personality. Ugh.
It just gets FRESH.
Last edited by GalaGirl; 07-28-2012 at 02:36 AM.