SNeacail: Thanks this is my plan so far. I am prepared for it to take a long time. I have no illusions about that. It helps to know there is someone in a similar situation. I hope it goes swimmingly for you!
RagingBibliophile: I completely agree honesty is the key. Its one of the things that attracts me to polyamory. I do want to do that eventually. There is no worry of me having an outside relationship without her consent. When we got married I promised her I would be faithful. Unless she releases me from that promise one way or another I will be.
snowmelt: I'm not trying to manipulate her per se. I want her to consider the facts and come to her own opinion on them. Her having an educated fact based knowledge of it before hand will make the discussion easier when it does happen.