Hello Raging B,
Welcome to our forum.
I think you can come out of this okay ... You just have to establish with your husband that there will be no more secrets, and no more lies. You may need to have several marathon talks and discussions before being ready to move on to the next step.
You also have to figure out what works for you, and what you can live with. What are your goals? What are your husband's goals? Are they compatible?
Hopefully Polyamory.com can be of some help to you as you sort through these difficult questions.
Love means never having to say, "Put down that meat cleaver!"