Originally Posted by nycindie
Leave the labels alone. I have found that, while having in-person discussions, using certain poly jargon sounds really dorky and dumb.
Isn't that the truth?! My bf and I were just talking about that recently. It can indeed sound dorky, dumb, and in some instances derogatory and hurtful.
In my instance as "Secondary", he agrees that it devalues and undercuts how much I really mean to him. Just because I don't share his full home life, doesn't mean that I mean less to him.
Stay away from labels where you can. They can cause serious trouble. Focus on the dynamics and parameters of each individual relationship.