Who ended the relationship ....you or your bf or gf ?
Would we being having this conversation if that relationship was still intact?
Do you realize you said I'll stay mono for a while then " I'll " reopen the relationship.....does he ever get a vote or voice on things? Does he pick out his own close ?
How would you rate the strength of your marriage? 5 yrs ago ...and today?
Are you being treated for your mental health issues ? Is counseling part of that?