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Old 07-19-2012, 10:40 PM
curiousandconfused curiousandconfused is offline
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Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 3
Default Looking for input

Where to begin. I guess a little about myself would be helpful.

First, I am married with 3 children, I am approaching 40 and I am a sincerely religious Catholic. I would not call myself devout because that implies things that are not true, I am terrible about going to Mass. But before I continue, it is important to say that it is not from lack of belief, I AM a Catholic, I believe it all, when I do things I know I shouldnít, I donít try to justify them, I just accept that I am no saint. So, now that that is out of the way.

A few months ago my wife hit me with 2 separate but related bombshells, the first was, she had essentially come to the conclusion that sex was significantly different than love and she knew that I was sexually frustrated a lot of the time and she really didnít mind if I slept with other women, since she knew I really loved her and would always come back to her. This started with mentioning particular women and moved to a more general statement as the conversation went on. In the course of that same conversation (this took house it wasnít like she just dropped it in a single paragraph or something) she brought up having a communal marriage with our closest friends, this was not a suggestion, but was a lot more than a musing. The women in this couple is the same women that my wife first mentioned as someone she would not mind if I had sex with. So after this I thought about things for a long while, and finally I brought up the first part ( the she really doesnít mind if I have sex with other women) to her best friend, who also happens to be part of the couple that she mentioned and who also happens to be a very old friend of mine. She told me that she believed my wife was being sincere and had discussed it with her, then she brought up polyamory. Very specifically, she brought it up regarding our respective families. I discussed it with her a a second time and she is obviously really okay with it, though she has not, at least as far as I know, discussed it even remotely with her husband.

I am, as my name suggest, I am confused and curious, and would like input from those here.
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