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Old 07-18-2012, 04:53 PM
Elinan Elinan is offline
Join Date: May 2012
Location: New York
Posts: 5

It's not my husband, it's the 'boyfriend' or the 'secondary person' I hate all these terms because of what they imply and don't imply all at once! I haven't used the term secondary with him because I don't like it. I also don't ever want to imply that it's secondary to my primary, because it is equal love if differing commitment and futures.

He's mostly at the point just wanting to take it very, very slow face-to-face. He's the type that's always pushed away women for fear of (and it seems a history of) getting hurt, and has even said he's struggling to push me away, and can't really. We are still really early into this (let me repeat as it bears repeating, early, months into this and I have no illusions of grandeur and know that there's many people on this planet...) and separated by 500 miles, so it's the hesitancy to actually meet up and spend a weekend.

So it's that raw intellectual understanding I'm looking for, of why it feels so hard for him to move his feet based on the good parts he's feeling in his heart. Does that make sense? Hard to put all of this into words and make it say what I'm trying to... =)
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