Originally Posted by CielDuMatin
I think it has a lot to do with personal insecurites, but I disagree with you that the rest necessarily follows. If everyone is perfectly happy with this rule in place, then it's most certainly not inherently unfair, no more than monogamy is.
I strongly disagree with you on this one. For one, the definition of "true poly" is a very dangerous thing to try to nail down - it might not conform to YOUR ideas of what poly is, but I think we have to be careful of trying to speak for the entire poly community, and to imply that something that everyone involved may well be happy with isn't "true poly".
I don't like OPPs, and don't have one myself, but to say that those that have them aren't "poly enough" is pretty offensive.
To me, an OPP is only ok if it is truly a personal choice, and not an agreement or something negotiated out of a partner's insecurities and/or need to control.
And I stand by my statement. Poly is way more than sex, and if you are hung up on such things and not on allowing a person to truly open up and follow their heart wherever it may lead, you are not following a poly spirit, and it really smacks more of fetishism to me. JMO...