View Single Post
  #18  
Old 07-12-2012, 07:32 PM
LovingRadiance's Avatar
LovingRadiance LovingRadiance is offline
Moderator
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Alaska
Posts: 5,086
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by ThatGirlInGray View Post
It's not a rule, but I can't imagine going very far in a conversation in a social situation without bringing up my husband and kids. And if it's someone I'm interested in being friends with, TGIB gets brought up shortly after. Anything else feels like false pretenses at best. And trying to explain after the fact (cause it's a part of my life, it's GOING to come up if I'm good friends with someone) has way too much potential to BLOW. UP. If there's going to be tension or drama, I'd rather it be at the beginning before anyone's invested.
HECK YES! I can't imagine not talking about my kids, boyfriend and husband. We all live together-my whole life is wrapped up in them.

Quote:
Originally Posted by nycindie View Post
Hmm, well, I like meeting people and getting to know them whether it turns into a romance or not, so I wouldn't think it was a waste of time. No one goes on a date just assuming it will definitely lead to a relationship, do they? For me, the revelation of having multiple partners is part of what is discussed WHILE getting to know someone, but doesn't have to happen beforehand. And sometimes the conversation doesn't go that way until the third date, or maybe until we've had sex a few times already. It all depends on the person and the vibe we have together. If it turns out he wants only monogamy with a monogamous partner, oh well, at least we had some interesting conversations and fun times. That's worth it in my book. But I'm weird - I think going out on dates can actually be fun.
I think this is a definition issue. To me "date" means that we are already considering a partnership as a possibility. I go out with friends and people from school socially, but we don't classify those as dates. So, it may not come up in those situations, in fact, even when Maca, GG and I have gone together to events in these groups-it hasn't always come up.
But, socially getting to know people type "dates" are different from "romantic dates". Yes?

Quote:
Originally Posted by CielDuMatin View Post
I think that a lot of this depends on what the definition of "date" is...

If there is ANYTHING intimate going on, or if there is even the talk of something intimate happening in the near future, then it really needs to be brought up asap. It should certainly happen before any sort of expectation of a romantic relationship is on the cards.

If it's meeting at a coffee shop for a chat about ourselves and the world, then that's a lot more low-pressure.

For me, talk of my partners tends to naturally come up in the conversation before long at all, because they are both such a significant part of my life. I know that this doesn't apply to everyone.

If I were moving to another country in order to be with a new partner, I think that this would naturally come up very quickly in the conversation. not just that I was moving, but why.
YUP!
__________________
"Love As Thou Wilt"
Reply With Quote