Originally Posted by km34
When would you expect to be told?
Personally, I don't expect to ever hear from guys that they are HPV carriers. They have no way of knowing when/if it's active or even if it's in their systems. I know it's a risk I take with every sexual partner I have, and it's a risk I'm willing to take. I also don't see myself telling anyone after it's been inactive for 6 months to a year.
I personally would like to be told before things get sexual, before there's involved kissing or removal of clothes. I would not expect to be told during/before a first date but also wouldn't mind.
I don't know what I will do as time goes on and (hopefully) my body heals from HPV. I think I would still want to know and would still tell people but I don't know that right now. I will have to think about it.
I don't expect most men to tell me if they have or been exposed to HPV. Most don't know and can't know. However, people like your husband, and my recent partners, know and - to my mind - should tell their potential partners of the risk. But, again, people handle this differently and they are not 'wrong' to do so. This is just how I think about things.