Originally Posted by WhatHappened
It's ironic...or sad? That both people have reasons to have so much fear. I often find it hard to believe that I'm really anything other than a new toy to play with while his wife is off with her boyfriend. I realize that even though it's highly unlikely, his wife could announce one day she no longer wants to be poly and then it's over in a heartbeat. And yet...it's eye-opening to see that the person who in theory should be more secure seems to have even more fears than I do.
You are not a plaything.
I had a tough time quantifying my risk versus his, too.
But in the end, feelings are still feelings. And loss still hurts, despite the label on the relationship.