Originally Posted by fireman29
In your perfect ideal world, would you want the guys to also have a relationship with each other, or date you separately? I know there are many factors at play, such as the orientation of the guys etc, but taking all other considerations out of it, how would you prefer it? would your preference be different if it was just a one night hookup with two guys?
Well, I'm bi and so is my husband/partner of 20+ years. So I have no problems nor fetishes around men being together...or not. It's about the people involved, not the configuration of genitals.
My husband and I are working out how to proceed with our third, who is a man who never considered an intimate or sexual relationship with a man, never mind a couple...but our polyrelationship has been growing simply and unfolding very naturally after a long acquaintance/friendship. It's a beautiful gift to receive from life.
For me, just having these two incredibly hot guys making me coffee in the morning--standing there in the kitchen, shirtless--makes me think I *must* have died and gone to heaven. To be squoze in between them as we watch a movie/pass the popcorn bowls, or nap, or whatever...it's amazing.
What is really interesting to me is that originally, I figured that if we ever added a third to our monogamous marriage (of over 10 years), it would be a guy for him. So I was amazed that our partner came in as my beloved first. Over time they are becoming closer physically, though it's not sexual at all. The interesting part? I find myself getting protective. Not quite jealous, but kind of keeping score. For instance, my husband will observe (neutrally and in trust/intimacy/updating) that he is feeling a bit left out...and I find myself quickly counter-observing that he has had way more time with the two of us, or our partner, than I've had alone with the latter. IOW, me saying to him, basically, "Back off a little."
If our partner ever developed a sexual attraction to my husband, I'm not sure how I'd react. At present the sexual thunderbolts and baby bunnies are all between our partner and me. But none of this is categorical. For me, it's a matter of what's best for everyone concerned. And now, I can't imagine life without our partner. There is a specific and particular balance for the three of us, out of our specific and particular personalities. And it doesn't hurt that we've all known each other for so long before this.