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Old 07-06-2012, 02:06 AM
GalaGirl GalaGirl is offline
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Join Date: Jun 2012
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Break ups are hard. You need time to digest and reset back to "friend level. " It's commendable that you both want to be friends as exes.

Quote:
XGF actually seems pissed at me for it. She thought that we would just break up but remain all friendly, lovey but no sex. Sort of boyfriend without benefits, who she can talk to about all her other boy problems and chases.
Even if the goal is to be good friends that are exes... She's gotta give you some ramp down time.

That's just not appropriate to expect in a fresh break up if you are not up for that. You cannot hurry healing. It takes what it takes. In your shoes it could feel like rubbing salt in the wound if you are not up for it. You need space to let the emotional winds to blow on through because THEN when the high emotion chills a bit you can choose to act with intention like a good ex. And not just REACT all grrr in her direction because you are still prickly.

You have done your responsibility -- stated your need and limit.

She stated her want -- and they do not line up.

So how will you talk and sort that one out?

You have the right to support and nurture -- how is she going to show respect, support and nurture as a friend that is a good ex?

By putting her want ahead of your limit? She wants to be all pals where you need to have a time limit for digesting a break up? Is your request not reasonable?

She's the one who broke up with you right? Gee. All you are asking is a month!

GG

Last edited by GalaGirl; 07-06-2012 at 03:03 AM.
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