Thread: Time: The Enemy
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Old 07-05-2012, 09:43 PM
sparklepop sparklepop is offline
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Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 461

Originally Posted by LovingRadiance View Post

That leaves him with 20-40 hours a week to socialize.
With me or anyone else.
Ouch... and I thought I didn't have time for anything!

I feel for you both. Time constraints are really hard.

So, from what I understand... M-F is limited and there's not a lot going on in your area after 8pm?

Then weekends are free, but obviously packed with leisure and home activities?

It's a shame that you've had problems in the past with the NRE burst.

If this helps, this is our general proposed schedule (my GF being the most active one):
M-F = GF has one night of quality time with me, one night with hubby
Weekend = GF has one date with her other boy, one day for the family

We have a three year old (my GF, myself and her hubby in the same household).

We do not introduce her to any secondary partners. If she ever did meet them, it would be a one-off, very irregular occurrence.

It would take us a very long time to do so - at least 6 months. We also do not have secondary partners in our home: we visit at their home. We feel that it's too much confusion for her. Of course, that could change over time - we're just starting to explore having long term secondaries.

I have a couple of suggestions... I don't know if this will help:

> Can you take any of the extra housework to give hubby more time to establish something more carefully? Or is this not possible?

> Can hubby cut down his activities at the weekend to have dates?

> Could you arrange for hubby to have one night out M-F?

I would definitely say that with your time constraints, once a week should be enough for extra dating. Twice a week *maybe*, just to weed out the potentials, for a month.

Another option is for him to consider putting extra dating on hold for the time being... or to look for something a lot more casual.

The idea of having a serious partner on top of all of this sounds quite heavy. Not saying he shouldn't (do you have a second partner?) ... but he does need to consider his polysaturation point carefully.
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