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Old 07-05-2012, 05:05 PM
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SNeacail SNeacail is offline
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Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Near Disneyland
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Originally Posted by nycindie View Post
Folding the laundry together doesn't count as sexy date time either
Actually in my house, I would consider this a date, if we were doing it together . Then again I'm and "acts of service/quality time" girl and husband absolutely HATES folding laundry.

I've been married for over 20 years and have 2 kids. Scheduling a date night, afternoon or breakfast is essential. Get away from the kids, get away from the house. Get away from the normal everyday stuff. Sometimes even a picnic at the park with the kids and dog can seem like a date because all the usual distractions aren't there.

Knowing each others love language helps. I spent years "doing" things for my husband, but since his love language isn't "acts of service" my efforts meant nothing to him. Just as all his attempts at telling me to "ignore the laundry, kitchen, etc" while he was feeling me up seriously irritated me. So because I couldn't get him to help me with the things that needed to be done, I had absolutely NO desire to even be in his presence at the end of the day and because I spurned his touches, he was hurt (he is definitely "touch"). For years I complained that he was "never home", so he tried to stay home, but would spend hours on the computer, which was just as not there. Once we were able to figure out that what I really needed was "quality time", he was able to understand and give me what I really needed and I make a greater effort to touch him.
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