here what I said ....it was a list of possible "if's" as to why he MIGHT not think they were benefits. I did not outright say he see's anything.
Quote:
Originally Posted by dingedheart
My point was it subjective to him. If he dreads communicating .....if he really doesnt like being in a state of constant competition. Then those things really can't count for him.
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Wait ...Anne ...your don't think her husband benefits as much as she does????
Why? .................... Gosh I didn't even outright say that
I think counseling might be a good idea however I think benefits are felt organically....during a struggle when people constantly point out benefits they see its feels like spin. Its like grasping to find a few indirect or subjective things to counter balance the negative that the persons dealing with. And what counselor is going to tell him he's wrong for not embracing or finding benefits that out weigh the negatives he's feeling.