Our sex life is pretty good, but we do not have it as often as I'd like. My wife is a Domme and I tried becoming a sub... but i'm not all that kinky. Maybe once every two weeks on average. Sometimes every week, sometimes a longer gap. We have a toddler and this definitely is part of the issue too.
Ugh, parenting. Does put a ding in sex life -- you become like weekend warriors or something. I get that. (Does GF take a turn babystting so you guys can have a date night or alone time? Do you babysit so they can get alone time?)
But "sex" -- make sure it's expanded enough, ok? Not just all about PIV. Sometimes we're too tired for full on PIV or a full on scene. Mutual masturbation will do. Or shoot, just WATCH while I drive and fly solo. It's time for sexual intimacies
as opposed to time for specific sex acts like penis-into-vagina.
There where times with a newborn that the urge was there but the exhaustion
of parenting killed the energy. We'd lay in the dark and just talk/think dirty. "Oh, you better PRAY to the skies and thank them I'm this pooped. If I wasn't so tired you'd be in SERIOUS trouble! I'd grab you and..."
It was fun sexual intimacy and bridged the gap to the next interlude where hopefully energy was a bit better. The babies and toddlers will grow up and it will get better on the night time parenting so you don't have to keep getting up to tend to diapers and things. Hang in there.
I said that if she's going to make time to have sex with someone else... we should be making time for the same in our marriage, first? Have a weekly date night, or something?
Yup. Not fair to add more partners if needs at home are not being met.