My hubby also feels very very insecure about all this. Since all this came out and i told him that I wasn't going to live unhappy anymore. He has made a change for the very best, but I still love my friend and want a relationship with him. I have agreed to stay with my hubby so we don't break up our family as well. I also love him and care for him a great deal and appreciate that he has taken the care and concern to change his attitude and communication toward me. It has made all the difference, but I think that being poly is just something that I am because I have displayed this behavior and types of feelings for people many times in the years past and I have become tired of beating myself up for it. My hubby is trying to understand. He still says that mono is the way to be for him. I feel bad sometimes though, I don't want to hurt anyone.
I love them too much.