Could it be possible that she was worn out from lots of discussion and was flooded with emotion? Like "GOD will this talking ever END!" Check this article out --
emotional flooding at bottom.
So I would give her a little space to calm down first. Tell her you want to talk in a week. Then when your appt time comes seek to clarify. "When you said... I heard.... did you really mean it that way? Or were you just overwhelmy and tired? Because that worried me. Did I emotionally flood you?"
She doesn't have to meet them all in person and have a great ol' powwow. But dang, phone, skype, email contact to basic exchange!
The "Hi, I am Jane Doe. I've recently started dating D. Just wanted to let you know I exist and give you my info in case you have any concerns about health or things being on the level. My husband is John Doe and he is full informed. We wanted you to be too. Thanks!
phone, email, cel whatever."
If D. is not willing to provide names (and he could omit or lie about number) forthrightly so she can do that I'd be alarmed too. So I see your concern and validate your feeling weird but... don't fly off the handle just yet.
Like I said -- maybe wife is just so OVER talking on this right now and needs a break from the negotiation table to chill before coming back for more. YKWIM?
Chasing her down when she wants some space from emotion flood won't help. Breathe, breathe. One step at a time.