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Old 07-02-2012, 11:49 PM
ThatGirlInGray ThatGirlInGray is offline
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Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Northern Cali
Posts: 552

Originally Posted by PhilosophicallyLost View Post
He essentially is the one who raised me and gave me many of the values I hold dear now, so to see that the open-minded brother I once knew doesn't exist in the form I thought he did is saddening.
I wonder, then, if we should be thinking about this as more of a "coming out to parents" rather than "coming out to sibling" situation. It doesn't change some of the bottom lines, like this being your life and your choice, but it may put his side into clearer perspective. I wonder if he's got some, "Where did I go wrong? Did I do something (or not do something) that led her to this?" going on, like other parents have had when their offspring come out to them. So he could see it as more his responsibility to fix than the average sibling. He's still incorrect that it's his business or his responsibility, but it could affect your response to him.

I'm surprised, though, that if he feels that protective of and responsible for you that he would want you to give Y ANOTHER chance when in another thread you've made it quite clear how many times Y has started to work on issues and then just gone back into old habits. If you have a chance to be happier this way (regardless of the end outcome of the various relationships) why would he want you to continue being unhappy? You'd think, even if he wasn't thrilled about the way you went about it, his biggest concern would be for you and whether or not you were going to get hurt, not Y.
Pan Female, Hinge in a V between my mono (straight) husband, Monochrome and my poly (pan) partner, ThatGuyInBlack
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