Originally Posted by BlueDragonfly
He told me he only told me to do what I wanted to see if I would actually do it... he then took that ability back.
This is bullshit. We aren't 7 years old, there are no "take backs". If he honestly thought he'd be okay with it, and then honestly discovered he wasn't as okay as he thought he'd be and asked for time to process and have you not take further steps for now, that'd be one thing. But you don't play games with or "test" your significant others. That's immature and manipulative and he needs to grow up.
I'm glad you think he's being supportive otherwise and I'm sorry about the other guy. Between the trust and communication issues I'd recommend you guys talk to a marriage counselor and get your own relationship solid before you try to make a mono/poly relationship work.