In essence, I think what 'romance' is, is a man picking up the slack for everything that goes on in a relationship.
In other words, 'romance' = gender double-standards. So, yeah. Asking for consent does break down gender roles and the Cinderella story to pieces. If you are in any way attached to those, I can only imagine you`d hate it.
In my definition, consent is part of the whole process of romancing. It's so intrinsic that I cannot see there being any romancing going on without consent. No consent? It's a one sided crush/infatuation/something else. Courting someone who does not want to be wooed is not romancing them.
At best it is unrequited love, and romancer backs off (hopefully) when gently turned down. At worst it gets... creepy... if they keep on insisting.
I also don't think "romance" is the man just picking up the slack for everything that goes on in a relationship any more than it is a woman picking up the slack in the relationship.
"Relationship" to me implies a flow of back and forth communication going on there. Nobody is a mind reader. The people romancing each other have to actually communicate. To me, "communication" is so intrinsic to me in '"relationship" -- there's just no real relationship at all if there's no real communication at all. Does not compute.