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Old 07-01-2012, 12:37 AM
feelyunicorn feelyunicorn is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Brazil
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Quote:
Originally Posted by GalaGirl View Post
It's more romantic if the question is actually ASKED. "I'd like X with you... may I?" or "I find the idea of X with you appealing... how would you feel about that?" You are engaging with me as a person, asking my thoughts and feedback.
The sentence in bold is exactly what I mean by 'asking for consent', and I think it`s implied in the expression itself. I don`t know why, but people usually tend to assume both extremes upon hearing it. Some think it`s sissy and insecure; others think it`s near-rape.

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Edit: I think the misunderstanding...

a) from the asking-is-sissy camp comes from partners who have already been given consent, but do not trust that it`s been given to them;

b) from the asking-is-rape camp comes from partners who feel entitled to a "Yes!"

But...I would say that neither insecurity nor entitlement are intrinsic to asking for consent.
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Last edited by feelyunicorn; 07-01-2012 at 12:56 AM.
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