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Old 06-29-2012, 03:36 AM
GalaGirl GalaGirl is offline
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Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 5,317

Definitely. Ofcourse now I want to know what you'd categorize as soft and what you'd categorize as hard, laugh :-). But I understand that may be a tad too personal ;-).
It changes over time. For instance that answer for me as a teen was a different answer for me in my late 30s. And though in late 20's before and after the experience of pregnancy it got to similar places, WHILE actually pregnant and later nursing that changed the spectrum analysis for me.

DH and I look back fondly at how weird preggo sex was -- it seemed to be all about slow motion and liberal application of pillows everywhere. LOL.

I don't see a big change in 40's but I'm sure my 50's, 60's and 70's will yield other perspectives on that spectrum too. Bodies change, age, and as people our tastes also change, age, evolve. etc.

The softest eros/erotic is probably a touch on the hand in a loverly way. Even a 12 year old can manage that -- and hand holding is often among the first expressions of one to another that is NOT your family. Vaginal or anal fisting is going to be in another place on the spectrum, no?

Touching your lover with a feather or end of a scarf over the eyes gently is on the softer end of tactile play than whips and chains, right?

It's all spectrum.

And it also changes with the partner in question. For instance, with DH? After twenty years together? I go into all kinds of corners of his/my eros. Light or dark. It's all good. But I don't kiss and tell. Too often anyway. HA! ;D

I would not be so keen to go all over the map with a brand new lover -- some things can only come with time clocked. Clock the time, then we'll see. Build up along the journey, build deeper connection, trust, then we'll see where it goes on THAT relationship's spectrum. Everyone has their preferences.

I am disturbed by some friends in their early 20s who seem to have the strangest view of sex... like they're supposed to be porn stars or something and when they come to find they are NOT, feel inadequate. Sex ed needs to happen for these young people HARDER than ever because they go looking up all kinds of crazy online. More parents and churches need to get on board with that like with Our Whole Lives curricula. They are leaving the kids out in the cold and without clear critical thinking of the erotic materials (soft or hard) that they access.


Originally Posted by Scott View Post
Lol :-). It seems from what you're saying that you are therefore.. lesbian?
Bi, married to stray man, closed at this time.

Originally Posted by Scott View Post
Had a look there.. didn't really see a list of movies to see.. probably just couldn't find the right link there.
That explains what feminist porn awards ARE. For shopping list, you scoot over to the movies and there's a subcategory for the past award winning titles.

No, do not see it too often in porn -- cast/crew commentary. Would elevate it a bit if it DID. But there are some few here and there that try.


Last edited by GalaGirl; 06-29-2012 at 03:13 PM.
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