I am sorry you are hurting. They really are not being kind. Going at the speed of the slowest, allowing you time to process. I don't know it played out time wise but you sounded ambushed.
Speak up about your needs not being met with CH. I mean, to the point where you are thinking divorce? Been seriously neglecting you!
Being caught up in NRE is one thing, but at the expense of the ORE it just is not fair.