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Old 12-02-2009, 02:51 PM
Quath Quath is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 504

One thing I have learned about internet forums is that if you put an idea out there, people will respond. That is one of the main reasons we post our comments and ideas. There are different styles of comments and some comments will trigger issues into a new direction.

A troll is easy to get rid of because they are only interested in strife and don't care about the discussion itself.

While I disagreed with Ceoli's final conclusion, I do understand her motive and reasoning. Her main goal seem to be removing excuses for sterotyping and encourage self reflection. I think we all agree with those motives.

Unfortunately, it was seen more as a personal attack than it was meant to be. Ceoli kept saying that it was not a personal attack and Mono's comments were an example of the issue. I don't think Ceoli meant it as an attack, though I can see why some would see it that way.

Part of this issue is the way we reach decisions. Ceoli is following rational lines of thinking to avoid contradiction and to verify her thinking. Mono's statement bothered her while it didn't bother anyone else too much. So she discussed it in a way that is more provable than emotional. But since most people were not bothered by his comment, that line of argument sounded too confrontational.

I find that if I am going to argue against someone's word, I try to get them to state it very clearly. Like I will say, "Are you saying that....?" A lot of the time, I find that people will not like the way i have it paraphrased and will correct it. That can avoid some arguments from the start.

I see this stuff like dealing with family. Sometimes we argue, but ultimately, we all care.
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