After much discussion, I am exhausted. She understands that their can be no expectation of a triad at this point and on the surface agrees that SO and I are in a committed relationship. She is very disappointed that I don't want a relationship with her and feels rejected. SO and I have been encouraging her to find another relationship but she says she's "happy with him" and "he is all she needs". This is concerning.
Because she is so insecure SO and I have been holding her hand and trying to boost her up to prevent a major meltdown. However, in this process I am feeling left out and controlled. I don't get to see him on a daily basis like she does so when I find out that he didn't call when promised because he had to go be with her, it bothers me. Or in order to see me he has to make sure that it works with her schedule I get a miffed.
Is my irritation with this situation unjustified?