Originally Posted by FigNewtonian
The vast majority of the people will see a standard divorce — we drifted apart has been the boilerplate we've offered. They will see us being very close friends — nothing more. Very, very, very few people know what's really going on.
Holidays are an interesting question. Being a child of divorce I'm accustomed to split holidays and alternating years. The mechanics of that are kind of muddy right now, but we have time.
You know, even if people were paying attention (and they generally don't), very few pay enough attention to catch you out at anything. And, of those, a good number just don't want to know.
As for holidays and other events, don't be too hard on yourself. You're going to make a few missteps here and there - not realize that Easter is a bigger deal in one household than another. Some folks make birthdays into big events while others barely acknowledge them. You'll get a feel for it as you go along.
Eventually, what you're shooting for is a sense of the new normality in your life. It'll take a while of "this is weird" before you settle in to, "This is just my life."